February 16, 2009

I Peed (and a dream analysis)

I was up all night Saturday. I kept waking up on the heels of crazy dreams about testing. There was one where you had to mix all these powders in tiny vials which went into a larger jar that filled with liquid as it rolled across the floor and when it stopped the vials filled with powder turned red if it was positive but you were only pregnant if it stopped rolling and landed with two tiny vials lying side by side, making two red lines. In another one, I had to run from a tent across a lawn scattered with dog shit to a final area where I could get the result. I woke up when I stepped in poop. So obviously I wasn't waiting any longer; I tested Sunday morning.

It was positive. Two nice bright pink lines. Before the test my heart was pounding and I was trying to mentally coach myself not to fall apart at the sight of just one line. Since transfer I couldn't help being disappointed that we didn't make it to the big beautiful blastocyst stage that we had with Piper and I was convinced those little slow-growers would never make it. In a weird way, to have these little five-cell embryos get anywhere made it seem even more of a crapshoot. Like rolling tiny vials across the floor hoping they land a certain way.

I recovered somewhat from my shock and of course am happy and grateful to be in this spot right now (please just let it stay!!!). But the news was slightly bittersweet because I shared my box of hpt's with a friend who got a negative the same morning. She was testing a bit early so she still has a chance. Also she didn't have to pay $10k to sleep with her husband or shoot oil into her ass. Odds are it will work for her in the next 2-3 months if not this one. She doesn't have to walk through all the shit we go through for IVF to get her two lines.

30 comments:

Grade A said...

Sarah, that is WONDERFUL news! Your dream was hilarious (probably not to you at the time). Looking forward to hearing your beta numbers. YIPPEEE!!!

Cibele said...

YAY!!!!!!!!! I am so happy for you.

Callie said...

I'm so excited for you! Those who haven't been through this infertility stuff have no idea the emotions that we experience in those 3 minutes between the pee and the result. I'm thrilled that you saw what you saw, and I'll continue to send best wishes your way!

Thalia said...

fabulous news, congratulations!

TeamWinks said...

Excellent news! Looking forward to more of it!

t said...

Yehaw! Congratulations Sarah. Those crazy dreams always seem to be a good indicator. And finding those two lines amidst mounds of proverbial crap... Yup, that about right.

My Reality said...

WOOHOO!!!

Jumping up and down, well, more like bouncing on my couch!

Rachel Inbar said...

Wow! I am so happy to hear it (you should see my grin :-))

dreamsandfalsealarms said...

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!! I love it when a POAS has a happy ending. Here's hoping your beta is stong, and all these tests become a real live baby!

Sticky Bun said...

Wahoo! Congratulations! I'm so glad you tested--I almost emailed yesterday to say, "forget what I said about Wednesday." But then I realized that that wasn't very supportive. :-)

Anyhow. Wonderful news. I can't wait to hear about the beta on Wednesday. Fingers crossed for great numbers, and great everything that follows.

IVF 40+ said...

Congratulations! So happy for you!!!

Maredsous said...

Sarah, that is fantastic news. I am so happy for you. I guess dreams can tell us a lot. Soon Piper will have a little sib to boss around!

bb said...

That is great news!!! Congratulations!!!!

Valerie said...

Oh Sarah that is wonderful news! Love the dream, imagine if pee tests really were that hard to take.

serenity said...

Awesome!!!

Man, can you imagine if real life tests were like your dream one?

xxx

Red said...

Am so excited for you! Congratulations. It is wonderful news!

mekate said...

Sarah-- WHAT GREAT NEWS! Two big pink lines (wahoo, doing a silly happy wiggly dance just for you!)

I LOVE it when it is clear. whatever it is. no murky in between weirdness. That is simply great news.

I so agree with t-- the dream about finding the positive in the sea of shit is too funny-- thank you for sharing those dreams with us.

Kate said...

Aaaaaaaaaaah!!! I can not wait to give you a biiiiiig hug! Best news ever. Stay, little one(so)!

Tinker said...

Yaaaay!

Bumble said...

Hooray - congrats Sarah!!! So happy for you!! And look what my little 5 cell has turned into now...! xxx

Valerie said...

Hey tagged you for an award!

Heather said...

CONGRATULATIONS! Can't wait to hear a GREAT number for you!

tipsymarie said...

So happy for you!! That is awesome news!!

lostintranslation said...

Yay! That's great news Sarah, congrats!! Oh, and I know all about crazy dreams...

Rachel said...

I just found your blog thru another one I follow. I was reading the story of having your little one, sounds like we have some things in common, IUGR, early induction, etc.
I'm just starting the process of having my 3rd baby, hoping it happens sooner rather than later...my nerves and my wallet can't take all the months of negative HPT's!!!

Myrtle said...

I'm so happy for you!! Gotta love those I'm-either-pregnant-or-I'm-nuts dreams! I can't wait to hear more about your BFP!!

Tam said...

That is such wonderful news sweetie, I truly am happy for you!!

I'm sure that evetyhing will be just fine, can't wait to hear the nice strong beta numbers!!

Hopeful Mother said...

PG dreams are so weird.

CONGRATS!

Tinker said...

I just couldn't resist looking up your due date: October 24; unless, of course, it's twins, then it would be more like October 2 (per ivf.ca), in which case you could actually have more babies born on the 3rd (and your birthday too!).

niobe said...

Wow! Yay!